I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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