Soap is not a condiment
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
There r osticjed everywhere
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
