she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Randomize
