Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
