He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
