If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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