6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
