We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
