hell yes lets make some ravioli
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
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