dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
