He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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