So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize