His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
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