the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize