if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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