we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize