i just wanna soil my oats bro
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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