Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
