I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
