where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
