Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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