I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Randomize
