He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
