This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Randomize
