He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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