we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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