ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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