she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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