Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
