Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
