I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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