I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
