Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
