She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
