She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
