Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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