Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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