The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
