do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
