they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
