weddingsv make me drug and hornr
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
