I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize