Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
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