I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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