My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
