The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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