fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
