I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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