people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
