The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Randomize
