And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
