Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I believe in your delicious
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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